HDK - System Overload

The seeds had been planted in advance
Still all this despair has made a mess
Revenge on my lips tastes sickly sweet
In wake of my pride's bitterness

Devotion is poison, so toxic
Passion is venom, it's deadly
Love is a cancer, a liar
Weaving corruption through every organ
It's always been easy, too basic
Life is now dealing in credit
All of my debts come together
Fate is an agent wanting repayment

I made my bed, I crossed the lines
I tasted seduction so malign
It's purring a warning in my ear
Confirming the fears I define

Hypocrisy sickens and haunts me
Fuels the fire, the hunger
Wary and scheming, I want this
Dulling the blade was never an option
Skeletons buried much deeper
Hidden and padlocked, this closet
Proffers the nerve to point fingers
Throw accusations, keeping my secrets

What is this grief surging through my veins
Devouring me whole?
What is this sting crippling me?
A total breakdown

Thrown out of balance, caught off guard
Seeing the end before the start
In spite of my sense, I lost control
Leaving me battered and scarred

Feeling mistreated, resentful
Boundaries are bleeding, uncertain
Blurred by the act of commencement
No reservation and no discretion
Driven by predicting the future
Test every option ruthlessly
All these emotions confound me
Feel like a stranger in my own skin now

What is this grief surging through my veins
Devouring me whole?
What is this sting crippling me?
A total breakdown